Tuesday, September 25, 2018


*Not mailed, but posted here, because he's in another country. Letter 37 was mailed, and will post next.

September 25, 2018

Dear Shan-man,

As a friend for around 16 years now, you’ve been on my list since its assembly last year. It was a nice surprise to find you bachin’ it in DFW during my weekly work-stays last year . . . until you chased your outsourced better-half all the way back to China. But let's pedal backward to when I feel most indebted to you - a window in time between 2003 and 2005.

During that difficult post-college chunk of my life, your couch in Tyler, TX was my weekend escape from Brenham (where nobody loved me) and Grapeland (where nobody else my age seemed to live.) As fellow desperate pew-warming Baptist bachelors to whom “third base” was a side-hug, we would eat fast food, talk about girls, and estimate our chances. And sometimes, when your hunger struck, I would watch you make one of those weird-ass liquid burritos containing tub butter topped with squirtable margarine and a splash of Pace. You have a crazy streak;  it’s a miracle that you still have a pulse.

Back on point, I’m writing to say thank you for your unrivaled hospitality. Your couch and companionship meant more than you know. Your friendship was vital respite in an otherwise very lonely stage of life. Now hurry up and get your foreign-exchange wife back to America so you can suffer with the rest of us under the vulgar fascist you helped crown on election day. We can argue about that some more when we cross paths again in DFW!

Gratefully yours,


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